True Confessions Friday:: I’m Turning 29 on Monday!

It’s no secret; I’m turning 29 on Monday.  But what makes this a confession is how I feel about it–and I’m taking it hard.  I wish I was one of those girls who could smile and say, “Well, hey, at least I’m in my 20′s one more year.”  However, I’m much more erratic in my response, which is more like, “Omigosh!  I’m going to be 30 in a year and I don’t have a husband or kids yet!”

I know marriage isn’t all it’s cracked up to be—it’s hard work.  I just always thought I would be married by the time I turned 29, so I wouldn’t have to worry about being 30 and single.  True, I could meet a fabulous gentleman in the next year, have a whirlwind romance, and a quickie marriage, but I’m not even sure I want that.  I don’t want to be married by 30 just to be married by 30; I want an amazing marriage to a guy who beckons me closer to God.

Being single at 29 isn’t the only thing on my mind. When I imagined what my life would look like, I didn’t imagine this.  I didn’t imagine struggling with depression/anxiety or worrying about finances or wondering if God still listens to my small voice.  I thought I would be strong, confident, with enough money and enough faith to sustain my life.

Plus, I wonder am I old or young?  Like is it still OK for me to play Guitar Hero or should I move on to only Scrabble? (Or what if I play Scrabble on a Nintendo Wii—is that acceptable?)  Do I have to dress differently once I turn 30?  What about how I need to act—does that change?  Is there something I need to do during the next year to prepare for 30?  I feel like there’s some big cosmic secret the 30-something’s are hiding from me, and I don’t know what it is.

I know that people will tell me that turning 29 (and 30) isn’t that big of a deal; it’s just another milestone in this journey called life.  Yet it feels like a really big deal because it reminds me of everything I haven’t accomplished—things I can’t just go out and do!  I’m reminded of what I’m not and what I still want to be.  What happened to all those years when I could have done something?  Or did I just do the best I could at the time?

The funny thing is that raking up another year isn’t that big of a deal.  Time is all relative and God is beyond time.  My mother told me that God doesn’t care if I’m 15 or 29 or 52; He’ll use me at any age.  And thinking about it, Jesus didn’t even start His earthly ministry until He was around 30 (and He never got married!)  See, I’m just trying to be like Jesus…literally.

I’ll get through my birthday and it’ll be oodles of celebratory fun.  I’ll still be the same woman I am today at 28 than I will be on Monday when I turn 29.  And really, age is just a number, right?  Right.  Just bear with me if I keep turning 29 for the next 5 birthdays or so; I’m not sure I can handle 30…yet.  Then again, I don’t have to because I’m only turning 29.  Yay for me!  I’m still in my 20’s!

Happy Birthday, Sarah!

The longer I know my best friend Sarah, the more I realize what an incredible gift her friendship has been to my life. Today’s her birthday, right? And I’ve spent several months scrimping and saving to get her something special because she does the same for me. Despite the meager possessions I am bestowing on her, I can’t get past the fact these are mere trinkets compared to the joy I have found in having a true friend.

To me, Sarah is a friend that is closer than a sister, which is cool because I’m an only child. Whether I’ve got great news to share or a breaking heart of tears, Sarah is there for me, and I for her. We’ve been through some pretty trying times, which instead of tearing us apart, solidified our friendship.

Because today is her birthday, I wanted to do something special for Sarah, like take her out for a great dinner or have Sean Astin call her personally (Sean, if it’s not too late, you can totally call!) or have one of my rock star friends sing to her on her cell phone (though I’m too shy to ask) because that’s the sort of thing I do to celebrate Sarah’s birthday. Last year at the PA Renaissance Faire, Sarah was embarrassed as a cast of merrymakers serenaded her. She turned bright red, of course, because she doesn’t like to be in center stage. All the same, I think she really enjoyed it.

For my birthday, which was on Easter Sunday, Sarah bought me something I’ve wanted for a long time—an

This is when I had short hair..she even liked me then

iPod! A device which has gotten much usage playing the latest hits in both our cars and on my ears, of course. Though the fanfare was subdued, it was the perfect gift. In fact, Sarah always gets me the perfect gift, the best of which being my little shih tzu, Maddy. It’s not the material things that make our friendship; it’s the fact that the material things don’t matter.

If I’m at the Dollar Store, I might pick up a smiley face balloon for Sarah…I mean, who doesn’t love a balloon? Or if Sarah’s at CVS, she grabs me a box of dried apricots because I like them. It’s a give/give relationship. We have spats, which are resolved quickly because Sarah refuses to fight. When someone refuses to fight, the situation really de-escalates.

I know that one of my greatest gifts is my writing, and while I could never really write a blog post or a book that would sufficiently tell about the wonderful friend that Sarah is been to me, know this—she has been there through it all.

When I was horribly ill at 21, she came to visit me the day I got out of the hospital.

When I needed a friend to watch ALIENS with me for a film class, she stayed after Bible study and helped me accomplish the assignment.

When I thought my life was so shattered I would never find all the pieces, she prayed for me and supported me.

When I couldn’t defend myself, she fought for me.

When I don’t think I can, she tells me that I need to get up and show up.

When I want to give up, she says it’s not an option.

When I doubt God, she points me to His love.

When I need a friend, I look to her.

When she needs me, I look to God for the grace to help her, my best friend.

Seriously, how do you honor someone like this? I don’t know, but I have tried to show you the character of my best friend, Sarah. I pray that all of you may find a friend as noble, loyal, faithful, and true. Not only that, but that you may experience the little things together like stupid comments that are only funny to the two of you, inside jokes, experiences, and adventures. And when you find a friend like that, and she turns 29, let her know how much she means to you, how you would be a lesser person without her, and how you prayed since you were 12 years-old that God would bring you a true friend.

Happy Birthday, Sarah, my bestest best friend!

Easter {Pics}

Well, here are some Easter/birthday pics from today in which we celebrated Jesus’ resurrection and my day o’ birth.  YAY!   Without further ado….

Here’s a wreath I made…

Plastic egg garland I made…

Yay for Easter baskets and birthday presents!

Water toys from Easter baskets (we already had the pirate set)

Catching up on some reading…

Mary and Justin, ain’t they cute?

Yummy cake with sprinkles thanks to Sarah…

And an awesome balloon bouquet from Sarah…

Blowing a mini-pinwheel I got in my basket…it’s my birthday and I can blow pinwheels if I want to!

And thanks to Mary, for making my hair look awesome….

Thank you to everyone who made my birthday so special, left notes on FB, sent me ecards–and took time out of your day with family to do so!  I especially thank those of you who shared yesterday or today with me, gave me such great presents, and ate food with us.  I hope you like those peanut butter eggs.  I had a great day, but it was blessed greatly by the love of friends, not to be overshadowed by the amazing resurrection of our Lord and Savior, Jesus, whose we celebrate especially today.

Last Call

Last Tuesday evening I had the privilege of attending a birthday party for a 90 year-old lady named Evelyn. Evelyn was my grandmother’s lifelong best friend. They met when they were in elementary school and continued their friendship until the day my grandmother died. Because of the close bond these ladies shared, my mom and I were invited to her surprise birthday party. Now the lady is half-deaf and completely blind–almost anywhere she shows up is a surprise to her.

It was held in the bar area of a fire hall, where I spotted the sign that’s pictured above. Believe me, there was no chance this party would last until 1:30 AM. Being as it was her birthday, I took Evelyn a present–a blue, handmade scarf (yes, I made it. Those of you who know me know well that I love to make and bless people with the gifts of scarves and other things I make). I explained in the card that I made a blue scarf just like that one for my grandmother, and I wanted her to have that scarf, because even though she couldn’t see it, I wanted her to feel its warmth and remember my grandmother’s love for her. I’m good with those sentimental thoughts, especially because I sincerely believe the things I say.

Today when I was having lunch with my mom, she pulled a card out of her purse addressed to me–a thank-you note from Evelyn. It reads:

“Amy…

I have no words to tell you how much I will cherish the scarf that you made for me. Thank you for coming to my party and making such a special gift. It will always be with me and your grandmother will always be in my heart.

Love,

Evelyn”

Ironically, I’ve been wondering if my existence matters, if the silly things I do like giving people scarves makes one bit of difference in the world. Then I get a card like this and realize, yes, they do. Silly things aren’t always so silly. Plus, this note is something I will cherish highly the rest of my life because I, too, carry my grandmother in my heart, and now I will carry Evelyn there as well.

I want to encourage you all to do that silly thing today…

*Make someone a scarf!

*Send an encouraging text message!

*Write an e-mail telling a friend how much he or she means to you!

*Smile at a stranger!

*Spend a little bit extra getting your loved one that really special Christmas gift!

And if you would, tell me about it. I love a good story.